July 26, 23:55

I am leaving for Russia on the second of August. I can't wait.
I was in the mood to pack my suitcase when I had 15 days left. It's not that I don't like it here, it's just that it's so true that your home is where your heart is. I miss my parents. I miss my cat...
I need something to keep me strong. I had my soul cleansed a bit here, in Israel. I had some free time to be on my own away from troubles, on the beach, see different people, different scenery. I was afraid that when I would be back in Russia things would go back to be the same old way, the bad, sad old way. A person I love(d) had a choice to come with me, but he chose to go to Spain. We talked sometimes... He was kind of nice, polite for once. Now he's back to Russia and he pours all the badness on me, like he never said... what is so wrong with me that I can never let go?.. Really!..
I'm so upset that the last couple days, more even, four days, I was suffering from a very bad headache. I took pills, nothing helped. It ruined my plans, I didn't visit some places I wanted to visit... Now I feel all the bad and my fears crawling back on me...

Tomorrow I'm going to the Utopia Park - it's an orchids park in the kibbutz Bahan. I've lived there once. They have a pool there, may be we'l be allowed to enter... I have to check my camera - free some memor space and charge the batteries.
I'm still not feeling completely healthy so I won't be going to Akko, I'll spend the last days of my visit to Israel on the Haifa beach. I really like it there, and you can find amazing seashells there. So, yeah... Will be building up my tan. pity that I had no opportunity to tan topless... oh well.

... and I need you on repeat all the time How in the world did you get to be so fine?!

I'm alone.                                                                                                                                                                                         I miss you.

The Old Man & The Sea

Nothing to do with Hemingway. It's a fish restaurant right by the sea, at Yafo harbour. I spent a really good day there today with the Chernyak family, my relatives. Haven't seen them for more than 10 years, and we are not as closely related, so I felt a bit awkward, but it turned out to be really nice. The girl is 5 years older than me, the boy's 3 years older, they are very easy going and open.
I ordered locus fish, the portion was fine (the waiter said that the one person portion is a 500 gram fish. I don't think it was 500 grams, may be it dried out while grilled, but I didn't leave hungry). They also serve tons of salads and appetizers before the main course.
After the meal we walked a little, then they drove me back home, giving me some really nice presents - a couple of body lotions and an Armani perfume... wow.

Apart from all the good things, my face starts peeling... but the tan is ok really, without redness. I'm dying of heat and melting right now - it's eleven thirty p.m. and the window in my room is open widely. I'm going to take a shower and go to bed with a Vampire Diaries episode...
Good night.

click here for more info on the restaurant

swimming day.

spent a day at the pool. Actually it was really nice. Got in the inside pool, the water was amazing. After a no-sleep night it was great. I wish I had a pool. A house with  pool, where I can swim whenever my heart desires. It'd be so great. Now I really gotta go to bed if I don't want to miss tomorrow, cuz really it's kind of crazy to be in bed and then suddenly realize you hear the birds singing and it's 5 o'clock and you didn't get to sleep...

huh...

You think I'm not interesting. You see only what you want to see.
People don't change at 30. Only if something hits them hard, on the head...

I should have known...

blabber.

My friend is really nice to me :) She says I'm a good "writer". Had to put it in quotation marks... I hope she reads it. An easy way to keep her updated, 'cause I forget about Skype...

The man who gave me a ride the other day is a real stalker. He called me twice from his own number he gave me, but I also got a bunch of calls from unknown and blocked numbers. I don't answer the phone, first because I don't hear it (always keep it on "Silent"), second - it's not my number - I'm visiting, so my aunt gave me her old sim-card for the time being. It was silent almost all the time, except for some calls from the bank, but they never were so late at night and we solved this problem... so I really think this man is trying to get me... Neh. Not going to answer.

I'm planning to go to Tel-Aviv tomorrow. To the flea market. I've heard from two people that it's an interesting place, and I have to buy some souvenirs. My... It's so hot that my brain is melting just imagining the trip tomorrow... I should probably write one of my cousins, but they are working, and I don't really want to wait for them... I'm bad.

Here you go - click to get the information on the Flea Market in Tel-Aviv.

picture from http://www.yourway.co.il/jaffa_flea_market.html

again from the start.

Back to watching Vampire Diaries, first season.
Back to missing the guy who was my boyfriend.
Back into make-up. pity it's way too hot to actually do something with my face...

Noticed I have the same earrings as Elena Gilbert (Nina Dobrev) from VD.

I'm acting stereotypish... making jokes that people are supposed to say... I want to break free from this.